I wrote about emotional costs. Well this weekend's service was a big help.

I've decided to take church service as my morning Bible study. This service was such a powerful message for me since the misunderstanding with my dear friend.

The first lesson is that 'God wants us to have success in our relationships." Weather it be friendship, marriage, or parenting.

2. "When we have rest we tend to drift away from God." We need to hold fast to God, and remain obedient to God and his commandants.

3. "Be slow to go to war!" Someone says something and tells someone else. The rumors begin. Division results. Brother goes to war with brother with out checking their facts. Don't make false assumptions. Before going to war, have a fact finding mission. Satin is the accuser of the brotheren.

4. "We have to assume the best when it comes to relationships." Stop and ask some questions.We may not have all the fact. We may have assumed the worst. This is a really good time to remember the track record we have with this person. When we perceive a wrong we can easily disconnect and forget the history we have with this person.

5. "Assume the best." Instead of going quickly to the wrong conclusion, look at them thru the eyes of God. We need to deal with friends with 'Assume the best.'

6. "Resist the temptation to get defensive." We tend to get defensive. This is where relationships begin to be distroyed. When on the receiving end of a misunderstanding, take the time to communicate understanding. Communication is necessary. Say it, say it straight, and say it lovenly. Share your heart. Be calm and speak the truth in love.

7. "Burry the offense." Don't hold on the past wrongs. Love and forgivness brings on newness of life. Be like Christ.

8. "Worship together." This is a big help in marriage and any relationship. I heard going to church together will take your marriage from the 1 in 7 chance to divorce to 1 in 400. Do things together. Bearing with one another in love. Endenvor to keep in unity with one another in love.

I had a dream this morning. This dream was about a thought for the future. If I am going to marry my dear friend I would need to look for a house having mandicap ramps and other accessaries already installed or have them installed.

Sounds expensive, and I know it is. Looking at how typical houses are built, things such as a wheelchair ramp would need to be installed. I have seen the costs that other people have put in to such modifications to their houses. I can tell you it is not cheep.

After all this you would think I'd be discouraged, but I am not. I am willing to do whatever it takes to provide for my dear friend. I am good with numbers and investing. With that I know I can manage money in a way to cover these expenses.

Some of you may think 'why not have her contribute?' Well for me a man is to provide for his wife and family. I personally do not want to be dependant on any money she makes. I want to provide for her every need. If she works it will be because she wants to work, not because she has to.

A side note to costs.

I have been using a prepaid phone since I don't have much use for it. But I have been looking over my usage and how much more money I am spending using this phone since meeting my dear friend. I have been and now decided to change my service plan to one of the unlimited plans. I know those plans cost more, but the costs I am paying now are beginning to add up.

This is just another thing that changes in life you have to account for.

This morning my dear friend called me and asked if I really asked her to marry me. Well we agreed to meet and I asked her again. Her father came over and I met with him. I foundn him to be an interesting man and look forward to seeing him again and getting to know the family even more.

I had not met her father and was excited to meet him. We talked for a bit. Mostly it was about his daughter, my dear friend. He told me about other men that have come and gone. He said once they get to know her they would leave and never be heard from again. Well I can tell you I intend to stick around.

I love my friend and am aware there will be a lot of costs involved in providing for her. I am willing to do what ever it takes to provide for her.

After we talked for a while about several things concerning our relationship. We finished with prayer.

I have had time to think about it and I STILL WANT TO MARRY MY DEAR FRIEND!

Emotional costs are bound to happen. Tonight a friend I love told me that a friend she had been praying for called with good news. To me it sounds as if they will be dating. For me my mind tends to view the future. I already tend to see them getting married and having a life together.

Now that is good for them and I will be happy for them. But for me right now I am trying to deal with the possible loss. I told her how I really feel about her.

I have been thru a marriage relationship that failed. But despite the failure I mearned to be a husband, father, and what it takes to make a marriage work. If there are problems in a relationship, those problems will need to be worked out. If they can not be worked out the relationship will fail.

I do wish the best for my friend and the other man. Regardless of what happens, it is God's will be done. Amen!

Last night an emotional cost came to mind. Change is a natural part of life. When counting the costs you are doing so because of doing or considering doing something important to you. When that change involves other people the costs go beyond any monetary value. It become emotional, lifestyle, and personal growth.

Knowing something intellectually and emotionally are completely different things. People have their own lives to live. Getting involved with anyone is major. People could spend the rest of their lives getting to know each other and still have something new to learn. I have friends I have known for years and I still learn something new about them.

although I am still trying to count the costs, I know I may never be able to predict everything. You can go the financial planner route and account for everything common then add 10%-20% to that and say it is good. But still it is what you do not see that really gets you.

The Bible tells us about good financial principles. Following these principles has benefited many people around the world. I pray that I can follow the teachings in the Bible like so many others. Amen!

Last night I went out with a friend. We had a good time and the night ended on a good note. What gets me is what other people are saying. First off it is none of their business. We are friends who enjoy hanging out and having a good time going to various places and doing things.

How does this relate to counting the costs? Well it may not be a financial cost, but it is a cost. People often judge others based on what they see. The sad part about this is those people doing the judging are supposed to know better and not judge others. Making and loosing friends is a part of life. It helps relieve the pain when those supposed friends have been doing something they know is wrong and continue to do so.

Another costs that came to light last night was having to turn down additional work hours. As most people know, more hours means a bigger paycheck. Yes this is a financial cost, but it is my choice. After turning down the extra hours I began thinking of other reasons to turn down the extra hours. But all that is moot. The issue is counting the costs. All those other reasons do matter.

As for my ongoing questions from past posts: I am not dissuaded. I am still committed. The costs are still worth the pursuit.

What a dream.
Last night I had a dream showing something I did not think of. In the dream I was having to buy another piece of equipment and then realized I had to get more equipment in order to transport that new equipment. Then the dream went on for several years showing me complications that will arise.
I knew there would be problems but decided they would not be so big a problem. This dream just gave me another perspective in counting the costs.
Am I reconsidering? NO! I am still willing to pursue this....
Am I discouraged? NO! I still believe this is worth following. God put this on my heart. I may not see what God had planed, but I know God has only the best in store if I follow Him.
Amen!