Positive or negative? What is the core of your speech and speaking ability? Often I hear people tell others what they can't do. This is very negative. It shows they have no positive outlook at the world and the people in it. I say you should be encouraging and tell others what they can do.

Often my dear friend and I get into a conversation of why we can't be together. I think we should change the conversation to reasons why we should be together. Instead of automatically going to the negative, we should be concerned with the positive.

When dealing with people we need to keep in mind they are made in the image of God and He does love them. When dealing with people in the negative you will drive a wedge between you and them. Other emotions such as resentment can develop and grow into something worse. Always dealing with others in the negative can and often does cause division. I have seen families torn apart because of this.

On the other hand I have seen families drawn together as they deal with each other in the positive. When a wife supports her husband, he feels respected and loved. When a husband leads, provides, and cares for his wife, she feels loved.

If I start looking at my dear friend and I, and how we should be together, the first thing is: We have many things in common. Having many things in common does have merit in building a relationship. Having differences allows the relationship to continue to grow. It give something to conversations. If every moment is spent together, then there would be very little or nothing to talk about. Here are some questions we could answer the next time we get into this kind of conversation.

Are you drawn to the transcendent God through that person?
Do you have an alliance with the other person in your spiritual walks?
Do you experience spiritual growth from interacting with that person?
Does the other person challenge you spiritually, rather than you having to be the impetus?
Is the spiritual connection based on reality?
Is the person authentic as well as spiritual?
Is the relationship a place of mutual vulnerability about weakness and sins?